Meditation is like going to the gym. When you are very unfit, it takes quite a while to build up some muscle and change the way you look and feel. Another analogy is that the meditation process is similar to learning how to play a musical instrument. If you want to succeed, you will need time, dedication and a consistent practice, says Rachel Bonkink.
Micro shifts
There will be highs and lows in the learning process but eventually, when you stick to the practice, you will see results, in the gym, with the instrument and with meditation.
Little micro-shifts will occur, you will have more patience, or you will keep your cool when others freak out. Is meditation a quick fix as such? No, but parts of the practice can give you an instant sense of calm.
Just stop thinking
Tibetan Buddhism encourages us to observe the mind in meditation. The invitation is there to become curious and gain more insight about the things that we think, feel and sense. The Yoga philosophy points us towards a state of mind where the fluctuations of the mind are stilled. Same same and, slightly different.
No matter the definition of meditation, all traditions will have relaxation as a fundamental aspect of the practice. This means that, in a way, whenever you manifest a moment of peace of mind, you are meditating.
Relaxation reduces your stress hormones, calming the sympathetic nervous system and thus giving the body the ‘ok’ to fully relax and stand down from any fight or flight reactions. The heart rate goes down and you can recharge the body and the mind. Through relaxation, the body can actually heal.
In his endorsement of my book, Flex Your Mind, Paul Grilley writes that I make Yoga practical. In my second book, I will do exactly the same with meditation. How can we bring the experiences that we have in our meditation practice off the cushion and into our daily lives?
We live in forgetfulness. But always there is the opportunity to live our life fully. When we drink water, we can be aware that we are drinking water. When we walk, we can be aware that we are walking. Mindfulness is available to us in every moment.
Thich Nhat Hanh
Continuous meditation
When we use a technique like mindfulness of
breathing, we observe the breath and every time we wander off, we bring our
attention back to the breath. Instead of mindlessly going after every thought (what’s
for lunch, my back hurts, I want to go to Italy, …), we notice that we wander
off, we acknowledge the wandering and, we return to the observation of the
inbreath and the outbreath.
Something as simple as this technique can teach us how to respond instead of reacting
in daily life. Imagine someone saying something to you that feels like an
insult. At that very moment, you have the option to mindlessly react or, … and
this is when it becomes really interesting…. you can mindfully respond.
Passion over passive
Responding with attention instead of reacting doesn’t mean passivity. Neither does it mean that you have to agree with everything. And even less does it mean that you become soft, lethargic, slow and rather dull when you meditate. Actually, we become sharper and much more attentive when we are relaxed. The mind can focus so much better; it’s more creative and becomes laser sharp. In many ways, meditation will also bring you a sense of freedom as you might no longer have the urge to be right all the time.
In conclusion, meditation is not a quick fix but creating a steadiness of mind can be an antidote for our overall anxiety. It is so very useful to train the mind to be able to create more peace of mind and a sense of joy.
In our modern day lives, we are bombarded with impulses that trigger us and there are all kinds of shiny distractions. Systematic training of the mind will lead to more happiness as you will gain more insight into what exactly triggers you and you will be able to create a sense of calm in the midst of chaos. Through meditation, you will be able to recognize ego as being ego, attachment as being attachment, aversion as aversion. And this awareness will bring you more insight into your own being.
Rachel Bonkink
As a former COO, Rachel is on a mission to support as many people as possible in their journey to less anxiety and more joy. She teaches meditation and yoga and has been a mindset coach for over 15 years. She is the author of Flex your Mind, 10 Yoga principles for less stress in a busy world. www.rachelbonkink.com
Rachel welcomes any and all questions via Instagram, @rachelbonkink