Co-Founder & Director, Capital College
Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) is a common medical condition among growing children. It is a condition that comes in different forms. In times like these, where uncertainty lurks around, parents and educators need to guide students to tackle such situations effectively. Although Social Anxiety Disorder is widespread and quite common, only 25% of children receive treatment. In the place for professional treatment, self-help is a good way to start. There are diverse strategies that allow students to cope up with social anxiety. Before one dives into the ways to cope up, it is essential to understanding what social skills bring out such behaviour. For instance, students often lack self-confidence and refrain from participating in open discussions, debates etc. Dr Sanjay Batheja, Co-Founder & Director, Capital College, explores some simple yet efficient ways to cope up with this condition.
Assertiveness
Most children dealing with social anxiety lack assertiveness and must cultivate this habit through simple self-help strategies. With practice, children can be assertive when required by communicating their needs in a relaxed and calm manner. Usually, children should express their emotions or feelings when they are hurt or unhappy. Along with this, they should learn to say ‘no’ when required, enabling them to be vulnerable yet socially strong.
Improve non-verbal communication
Attaining non-verbal communication is crucial irrespective of the condition of any child. However, with social anxiety, this becomes increasingly necessary. You will notice that socially anxious kids will often adopt a ‘closed off’ stance even without realizing it. Students need to have a relaxed posture; for instance, having their hands on the side and speaking with good eye contact. All of this will reflect positively and allow children to seem both confident and approachable.
Verbal Communication
Along with adopting a relaxed body posture, children must know how to start a conversation, move along with it, good listening skills and a decent attention span. For young adults, one quick tip would be to listen first and then make a comment about whatever they are speaking about. For instance, you could say “Are you speaking about last week’s examination tests? I couldn’t believe it either!” Here, you are asking a question that reflects on your listening skills and also positively speaks about your confidence and opinions. Additionally, expose yourself to as many opportunities as you can; this is all a learning process and with time, students can master these skills.
Deep Breathing
When one has social anxiety, they probably have a strong emotional reaction chain. This is evident in different kinds of social situations. One way to reduce these anxious reactions is to drive your body to a relaxed state. When your body is relaxed, you will find your breathing to be slow and natural; letting your mind and body off the negative energy. You may notice, your child’s breathing and heart rate would be very high when they are in anxiety-provoking situations. This can sometimes make anxiety symptoms even worse. Some of the effective deep breathing techniques include
- Count the number of breaths you have taken in one minute
- Focus on breathing. Always inhale and exhale through your nose – Inhale and exhale for three seconds each and continue doing so for five minutes
- Count your breaths per minute and check if the number has gone down
- Practice this exercise four times a day until you feel completely relaxed
Reduce negative thoughts
If you are chanced upon a socially-anxious environment, you may notice that you probably misinterpret someone’s facial expressions and jump to conclusions. This fuels your emotional reactions, making you more anxious. Specifically, two common thought patterns can lead to anxious feelings. –
- Mind Reading – You are certain about what others feel or perceive about you. For example, “Everyone can see how anxious I am.”
- Personalization – The way one behaves is because of you. For instance, “She looks bored. I probably shouldn’t have called her.”
To cope up with such feelings, some simple techniques are given below –
- Think about a recent experience that made you feel anxious. Pen it down, during or after the incident.
- Question yourself to challenge your negative thoughts. For instance, when people look uninterested when you are speaking don’t think “They are bored because of the way I speak.” Instead, think, “This probably has nothing to do with me. They must be tired.”
- Try to recollect about the previous social situations and try challenging them with alternative solutions.
There are many such coping mechanisms and strategies to fight social anxiety. The first step would be to accept oneself and not give up throughout the process.